Adventure-seeking Relationship Style What Does It Mean For You?

Is your relationship style adventure-seeking?

If your core relationship desire is adventure it means you enjoy exploring new things and challenging the status quo. You want to feel excited, and you’re drawn to things that are on the risky side. You seek out pleasure and desire. You value a satisfying sexual connection. You do not like to feel bound to anything. Control is very important to you. 

Your hidden desires

There are 3 hidden desires for the adventure-seeking partner. It may be one that is true for you, or you may resonate with all 3. 

3 hidden desires for the adventure relationship style:

  1. Change: You have a strong aversion to boredom. You thrive with new things and diversity. 
  2. Pleasure: You are open to new ways to experience pleasure. Variety in your sex life is crucial. 
  3. Freedom: You want the power to try out your ideas and explore your dreams. You resent being limited or constrained. 

Phrases that fulfill you: 

You want to hear words of admiration that make you feel wanted and chosen by your partner.

Statements you want to hear:

  •  “I find you really attractive.”
  • “I want to have fun and be playful with you.”
  • “I’m excited to try new things and go on adventures with you.”

While hearing those words from your partner can go a long way, those messages can also be conveyed by actions. And for some people, showing instead of telling can be just as significant. 

The challenge with the adventure-seeking relationship style 

If you’re feeling hurt or frustrated in your relationship it’s usually because you are questioning the sense of adventure within your relationship. More specifically, when you’re feeling upset in your relationship, those before-mentioned statements seem false to you. During an argument with your partner, you may ask yourself the following:

  • “Have we lost the spark and passion?”
  • “Are they trying to control me?

Your adventure-seeking relationship style might have you looking for change even when things between you and your partner are going well. Your pursuit of newness and variety may leave your partner feeling inferior. And your restlessness could make them feel like they are unable to satisfy you. 

Develop security

There’s always room to grow, in all aspects of life. Your relationship is no different. Focusing on the desire opposite adventure will help your relationship. The security seeking style is on the other end of the spectrum from the adventure style. Security in a partnership is about support, feeling as though you can lean on one another through the good and bad. This leads to trust and longevity.

You can make your partner feel more secure by giving them reassurance, either with your words or actions. Tell them, “I love you”. Be consistent with your affection. Don’t leave them waiting when it comes to phone calls or messages. You can remove the space for worry by reminding them that they are your priority. 

How to love a partner with an adventure seeking relationship style?

Here are 6 tips for loving a partner with an adventure style:

  •  Surprise them with a fun activity or trip: Take them on an unplanned road trip without a destination! Plan an activity to try something new.  Your partner loves spontaneity and trying new things with you so this will speak right to their heart. 
  •  Explore sexually: Shake things up in the bedroom. Talk about what you’d both like to try beforehand, or make a list and see where you overlap. Try to keep an open mind.
  •  Support them in a new idea or desire they have: Give your partner full permission to be themself and let them know you will be there by their side.
  •  Take a personal growth course or workshop together: Join them in their quest for change and embark on a journey of personal development together. 
  •  Learn how to be more sensual: Offer them a massage. Kiss them longer, and slower. 
  •  Plan a sensual experience with your partner: Take a romantic bath together, watch the sunset, or enjoy an intimate dinner in a special place. 


Taking the next step...

Most people have both a primary and secondary desire. Find out yours by taking this quiz. Your results will be emailed to you.  Make sure your partner also takes the quiz and you discuss the results together. You don’t have to settle for a relationship that’s just “okay”. Together you can uncover how to get the type of love you want and need

If you’re ready to fill in the gaps and have the adventure you so desire, join one of our workshops. Our workshop will equip you with the tools you need to take your relationship to the next level.  Love can be simple. Your desires can be met! 

You can learn about other relationship styles below:

Autonomy Seeking

Connection Seeking

Security Seeking


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